Wednesday, October 25, 2006

How To Play Poker Successfully In Four Steps

1. You are dealt a hand. Do look at it.

2. This being the modern world, you are probably playing Texas Hold’Em. Ah well. Nothing we can do about that. But do try and look at the three cards dealt face-up on the table.

3. Think for a bit. This is important.

4. Do not do Anything Stupid.

This will work seven times out of ten.

Don’t thank me.

15 Comments:

Blogger Pickled Olives said...

It's the "think for a bit" that always gets me! I usually win at the tables without cards.

3:21 am  
Blogger amphimacer said...

I am feeling resentful, TD. If everybody subscribes to your impeccable advice, I may never win again, since basic common sense is all I have going for me. I can barely remember what beats what, and I can't do the math that would help because I'm too tired. You are clearly too good for us mortals. Perhaps you should turn the television back on. And trim your nails. Definitely, trim your fingernails.

1:41 am  
Blogger Krabapples said...

Well, it's definitely sound advice, i'll give it that. Perhaps next you can tell us how to win at Guess Who, or Boggle?

11:46 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

P.O. : I myself do not freqeunt casinos and do my recreation on the line, so do not know of these tables of which you speak.

Amphi-Guy: I know what you're doing. Sending me down the road of male grooming and daytime television is your plan to rob me of all my normal faculties on the off chance you ever face me across a green baize table. Fear not. I do not do it other than on the line, and never for actual cash.

M_G: Sarcy.

9:45 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

A: Oh. We're all funny tonight.

1:07 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love poker.


It sounds rude.

2:54 pm  
Blogger Will said...

I'm not so sure about step 1. If you don't look at the cards, you can maintain the perfect poker face.

6:12 pm  
Blogger FOUR DINNERS said...

I'm safer playing snap

8:37 pm  
Blogger ldbug said...

Ah NOW I see, don't do anything stupid. Well, shit, if only I'd known that years ago;-)

10:24 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

RD: Oh dear.

Will: Welcome. You are quite right about the poker face. However, betting in this manner is akin to closing your eyes and sticking a pin in the racing papers. And not a guarantee of long-term financial success.

Dinners: Me too, if I'm honest.

ldbug: Welcome. It's only obvious once you know.

3:44 am  
Blogger Dave said...

I have just lost $20 using your strategy. But I managed to look pretty cool doing it.

4:16 am  
Blogger Dave said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

4:16 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Dave: Hello and welcome.

Erm. Gosh, sorry and that. I never said play successfully AND win though.

Looking cool is the main part, I agree.

10:13 pm  
Blogger * (asterisk) said...

I love poker anyway, especially Texas hold 'em. Sport of kings. Yes, I know they say that about horse-racing, but I beg to differ.

9:23 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Horse-racing is the sport of men who have visible nose and ear hair.

10:56 pm  

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