Monday, November 19, 2007

Conversations With My Daughter.

Favourite Daughter is five years old.

I know not to succumb to her every whim and hint of affection. Because it is too easy for fathers. Too easy to sickenly dote upon our daughters. We are faced with a miniture version of the woman we first fell in love with but who has no adult faults and is essentially perfect.

And it is too easy to fall head-over-heels in love with these beautiful small women. And no good will ever come of such a scenario.

I am lucky however.

Favourite Daughter: [I have been kissing her neck] Get OFF.

I get OFF.

FD: You're prickly.

It's the weekend. I have not shaved.

She suddenly grabs my face with both hands and stares at me with the completely unselfconscious manner that only children possess. And I know my heart will break the minute she loses this ability.

FD: Some of your prickles in your beard are black, but LOADS are yellow! But most are silver.

Me: Em.

She peers at me a little longer. And alters the angle of her head. Her eyes go wide.

FD: You've got a beard IN YOUR NOSE!

Me: Right.

She shakes her head in astonishment.

And without warning pulls my bottom lip down.

FD: DADDY! Your TEETH are yellow TOO! But only the bottom ones. You know. The ones that are all crossed-over.

Me: Right.

And we continue our day.


Anonymous Eliza said...

'And I know my heart will break the minute she loses this ability.'

that's adorable!

And a nose beard is normal, not getting rid of it- is not!

11:08 am  
Blogger Brennig said...

The scary thing to carry about with you, is this memory she has just built, the shape of your features, the composition and your smell...

This is the memory of you that she will carry about for the next few years - and a memory that will accompany her for the rest of her life.

2:10 pm  
Blogger Rachel said...

That was so well put. She sounds adorable and very smart. I see a future for her in cosmetic dentistry.

And a market.

3:38 pm  
Blogger Cynnie said...

my daddy had five girls..
and we were all adorable..
did i mention daddy died of a big ol' heart attack at 45?

5:07 pm  
Blogger The Boy said...

Yeah, I've got a four year old one of those. I love her no less than the boys, but differently. That love truely is unconditional, both ways. Long may it continue.

6:22 pm  
Blogger tea and cake said...

Um, you'll get it all again when she has a daughter. Mr T balances precariously around the little fingers of our daughter and two of our granddaughters, ahhh... magic.

9:36 pm  
Blogger Misssy M said...

My four year old daughter shouted on me today, "Hey there lovely girl" which is a direct repeat of what I call her and I teared up in a nanosecond. It's not just Dads and daughters. Mind you she does know how to wind me up, which I believe is definately a Mum/Daughter thing.

And...em, nose trimmers...perfect Christmas stocking filler, Tired Daddio!

10:16 pm  
Blogger Angela-la-la said...

So what's her name - Trinny, or Susannah?

1:33 am  
Blogger Clarissa said...

8 years ago I was indelibly scarred by a four year old. Ever since my god daughter made the observation that I have hair in my nose (accompanied by peals of delighted laughter) I am paranoid. I'm looking into electrolysis.

3:12 am  
Blogger bittersweet me said...


It is wonderful when you can still astonish your children.

8:58 am  
Blogger FOUR DINNERS said...

Enjoy it while it's there mate - beard nose n all.

Too soon it'll be "Daddy can I have £50 to go clubbing tonight?"

You'll still love her but it'll be sort of different.

11:31 pm  
Anonymous oe said...

Now I want children.

I hate you.

2:53 am  
Blogger Rach said...

A beard in your nose and crossed over yellow teeth? Fantastic. I laughed out loud reading this!

10:49 am  
Blogger londongirl said...

Lesson No1. Never rely on children for an ego boost. Even if they do boost your heart.

9:08 pm  
Blogger Delboys Daughter said...

another 5 year old comment:

*looks at self intently*
"Mum.. You look like you are having a baby with that belly you know."

11:52 pm  
Anonymous TDub said...

My little boy peered at the crown of my head intently while I tied his shoes. "Hey Mom, I think your bald spot is getting better!"

7:15 am  
Blogger Pie said...

If only we could pull this off as grown-ups. It's a shame kids have to learn not to say what they are thinking.

9:22 pm  
Anonymous Franki said...

Hopefully she'll still be sayin "Get OFF!" to those young men who will eventuallly want to kiss her neck too.

7:59 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Right then. Apologies for the delay, but you know. Life and that.

Eliza: Many thanks. The nose beard has gone.

Brennig: You are not helping

Rachel: I don't need to comment.

C: I'm not surprised he did, I could keel over now. (I am sorry though)

Boy: With you.

Tea: You are giving me nightmares.

Missy: I think you're right about the mam/daughter thing. Don't get me started on the clippers thing though. I got a pair for FATHERS DAY a couple of yours ago. The fallout is still ongoing.

Ang: Her name is Fantastic.

Clarissa: Extreme. They're there for a reason, and if you insist upon the city you'll need them. And probably a face mask.

Me: I'd rather astonsish them in other ways.

Dinners: You have my sympathy. And I'm fucking dreading it.

Overnight: Why? Why would this tip the balance? A miniture female version of yourself telling you you're shit? Why? And sorry.(Not really)

Rach: It wasn't meant to be funny.

Londonlady: Quite right.

DD: HALLO. Thank you for reminding me there is one I will not have to suffer.

I don't mind a bit of a belly me.

TDub: Welcome back. Honestly though. They're bastards aren't they.

Pie: Unfortunately for my social life, I possess identical social skills to my five year old daughter. I don't recommend it.

Franki: Why?

9:09 pm  

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