Monday, June 01, 2009


A lot of my working time is spent in meetings.

More so now that my boss has returned from her holidays.

I shan't go on about it. I'm sure the world is awash with 'hey! Aren't meetings a bit pointless!' stories and mine'll probably not be as good.

This morning's theatre of foolishness was not one of my best however. I can normally disrupt these things with earnest-looking absurdity but have not the heart due to an unpleasant sleep problem I had thought long-since conquered.

I drift through.

I hear one salient point that I vaguely think may be of relevance and absent-mindedly make a note of it on my pad without really listening.

Two hours later in a fug of sleep-deprivation I check my one-and-only note from the morning's meeting. It reads thus:

'Lesbians all have different names.'

I gaze blankly at this astonishing piece of information. I resolve to try and sleep now and then and pay more attention.


Blogger Mia Dickinson said...

Hey Tired Dad!
Thanks for the comment too! I found your blog on another persons page and have been addicted to reading it since, it makes me giggle in the middle of the night.
I suffer from major insomnia. Its a little bit soothing that someone other there knows how I feel.
Mia x

12:25 am  
Anonymous janeway said...

This used to happen to me during 7 AM classes in college. Makes for interesting notes to study from.

4:38 am  
Anonymous Frogdancer said...

I was reading thids in front of a year 10 class silently working on their practice English exam.

Scared the crap out of them when I got to your note...

5:48 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Mia: Hello yourself. Voice of some experience here - get some help with it. It's a bastard. And thanks for your kind words.

Janeway: Hello.

Frogdancer: Fuck me. I bet they thought you were doing real work and are now very worried about next term.

7:19 pm  
Blogger Ellie said...

I'm sure there are some lesbians that have the same name. Please correct your boss next time.

7:54 pm  
Blogger The Preacherman said...

What if they're both called Jane?

9:14 pm  
Anonymous monkeymother said...

Advice for coping with insomnia and meetings:

Shove earphones* in and tune phone to Radio 4. Late at night The World Service comes on. You will be entranced, or not, by some broadcast but will never hear the end. In meetings, the afternoon play should do it.

* Recommend use of only one earphone at night, as surgical removal from pillow-side ear can be tricky.

As for those lesbians, I know two called Diane. Is that any help?

8:38 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Ellie: I'm not sure it was even my boss or indeed how it came up. The meeting was on the subject of 'revenue projections' whatever that is when it's at home.

Preach: Eh?

MM: Sound advice I am sure. Ironically I have my clock-radio thing set to Radio 4 to wake me in the morning. There is a strong chance I am getting things the wrong way round.

Do the two Dianes know each other? If so do you refer to them as 'the Lesbians Diane'? And if not, when you mention 'Diane the Lesbian' in conversation how are people sure to whom you are referring?

Of course none of this matters. I'm still trying to figure out how this revelation came out of a dull business meeting. They'll be telling me that heterosexuals all have different names next - so you can tell them apart and that.

7:28 pm  
Blogger Sewmouse said...

Welcome back, Mr. Tired Dad.

7:28 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...


7:32 pm  
Anonymous monkeymother said...

When the MF is away, I just leave the radio on all night. Sleep better than a baby.

And as for those Dianes no, they don't know each other but, do you know, I just call them Diane. Like the two Jackies and lots of Tims, Tonys and Johns. Come to think of it, I know two Tims in a relationship.

I'm going now. I'm babbling.

6:06 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

MM: I shall try it tonight.

What are they all, like benders and that? They've got normal names. I thought they were all called Dominic and Sebastion and George (if female). Are you telling me it's not that simple? When did the world get so complicated? I too am rambling.

8:18 pm  

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