Friday, February 01, 2019

I Nearly Died And Everything

Of the many things I find wearing about open-plan office work it’s the ‘tea run’. Committing myself to making a dozen hot beverages for people with which I have only a fleeting relationship several times a day only to receive a half-filled mug of unsatisfactory tea on ill-judged occasions that I then discard is not my thing.

As such I refuse to be involved in the whole routine. I don't make tea.

My Boss: How’d it go at the hospital?

Me: More a follow-up than anything really. I’ve got to go back next month…

The conversation goes on for a while and I learn that my insufferably Fussy Colleague had called the ambulance.

My Boss: It was good she did really. From what I can gather you’d be dead otherwise. If the paramedics hadn’t took you to the Critical Care Hospital I mean. One time her fussing-on was a good thing.

Me: Oh. Yeah. Spose. [I look through the glass window of my boss’s office at Fussy Colleague, busy faffing around and making everyone’s life tiresome for no good reason] You could say she saved my life.

We discuss other stuff for a while and five minutes later I’m sheepishly stood at the end of Fussy Colleague’s desk.

Me: Hey.

Fussy Colleague: Mmmph?

Me: So. Ehm. Fancy a cup of tea?

F.C: [Without glancing from her screen] No, Dave’s just made me one thanks.

Me: Oh. Ok.

Whatever, I tried.

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