Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Other People.

The problem with the bulk of them is that, sooner or later, you discover they are quite mad.

My sister is in my kitchen. Also in my kitchen is a metal cylindrical thing with holes in the side in which I keep utensils too big to fit in the cutlery drawer. Wooden spoons. Potato masher. Screwdrivers. Stuff like that.

Sister: Do you know there's a teaspoon in here? Should I put it in the drawer?

Me: No. Leave it. I like to know where it is.

Sis: What?

Me: It's my Boiled Egg Spoon.

Sis: What?

Me: I eat my boiled eggs with that one.

Sis: Why don't you just use one of the other ones?

Me: They're not quite the right shape.

She looks at me as if I have lost my marbles. She was on the verge of moving it to the General Teaspoon Population for fuck's sake.

Like I say. Mentals, the lot of them.

On a completely unrelated note, I have ditched Internet Explorer in favour of Firefox 15 years after the rest of the world has done so and am delighted to notice that it has put my Favourites in alphabetical order - something IE has long refused to do.

As such I rediscover a number of blogs and sites I have forgotten about as they've not been in the right part of the alphabet and frankly life is too short to faff about.

I am even more delighted to discover NOT A SINGLE ONE EXISTS ANYMORE! Probably purely because I have ignored them for some time and the administrators have just given up! This is quite brilliant as, at a rough estimate, I ignore 99.9999999999999% of the internet! Therefore, it is surely a matter of time before I dominate the web and am given a prize of some sort!



Anonymous Em said...

A special spoon... sweet. I have a special glass.

Obviously the World Wide Web is yours for the taking. Good luck.

10:10 pm  
Blogger punxxi said...

Strange, I would have taken you more as a safari or opera dude.
I do not allow people in my kitchen, at all,which works wonderfully well.
Glad you are back to posting, kid!

2:22 am  
Blogger Max said...

Favourites (or "bookmarks" as we mentalists know them) are old hat. You can share them between all your computers with delicious.com or similar interweb inventions.

11:12 am  
Blogger Debster said...

You could have just right clicked and gone to arrange in alphabetical order, but yes, Firefox is better. And less likely to induce murderous rage.

12:29 pm  
Blogger Four Dinners said...

egg head

5:55 pm  
Blogger Plummy Mummy said...

oh dear. The party has moved from Firefox to Chrome. I think you can even have spoon wallpaper.

8:28 pm  
Blogger amphimacer said...

Chrome is okay, egg spoons are fine, but clearly what makes life worthwhile is Internet Awards. Your readers already believe you dominate the web, since we must pick and choose between what's out there. After the newspapers and e-mails, there's Tired, and then there's endless remorse.

3:21 pm  
Blogger Rachel said...

I have a special mug...its a christmas mug and I am jewish. You are my special brit.

4:48 am  
Blogger Cynnie said...

i dont have special anything ..

i need to work on this

5:29 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is this blog a piece of conceptual art exploring disingenuousness or are you just pretending to be a completely self-obsessed, disappointed, ineffectual wanker?

9:53 am  
Blogger isabelle said...

I have a boiled egg spoon too, makes sense if you ask me.

Is Peter just masquerading as a cynical harshful critic with no sense of humour or is he just a great big meany?

2:24 pm  
Blogger Gaby said...

I think Pete would like some affirmation that he is extraordinarily wise and brilliant.

Quite sweet, really.

1:34 am  
Blogger Four Dinners said...

Dear Pete,

You must be Tired in real life?

If not, damn! There's two of them!!!

10:11 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Em: I too have a 'special glass'. It is the remaining one I have not accidently smashed.

Punx: Opera was dredful I found, and I don't believe Safari works on PCs but I may be wrong.

Max: Hello and welcome. I am aware of these (are they called 'feeds'?) but prefer to check things when I feel like it.

Debs: It never worked. IE is SHIT.

Dinners: Nice one.

Plummy: Chrome? Are you joking? Google have already decoded my DNA, I'm not giving them any more personal info. They even host this horrible blog for fucks sake.

Amph: Thanks. I think.

R: You're very kind. What is going on with the dormant blog and the empty new one?

C: You have, you just don't realise it. Wait until someone tries to put it in the wrong place.

Pete: Thanks for your input.

Isabelle: Hello. Glad it's not just me. And I don't know.

Gaby: Indeed.

Dinners: The irony had not escaped me.

10:39 pm  
Blogger Reading the Signs said...

Great to see you back (I know I'm almost a year late) - I used to love reading your blog and thought you'd gone for good.

7:02 pm  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

No I'm still here. Thank you.

8:55 pm  
Anonymous Dave said...

I am gay!

8:36 am  
Blogger Tired Dad said...

Delighted for you. Tell your parents now. Hope your wife won't be too miffed (they're always the last know aren't they?)

10:14 pm  

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